Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Homily for FUBECCA's wedding

(in case you wanted to read it)

We are all a part of teams. At Radio Maria, Matthew and I often work together as a team. At carle, bridesmaid Sarah and I are a part of a team. I am a member of a softball team with several people here. Families are also a team.
When two people get married they become a team. There are truly only two people on this team. Today, the team that we're making is Matthew and Rebecca. The rest of us, all of us here, are fans of this team. We are not on the team. We can support this team, like we support any other team, but we are not on the team. Even those of us who were there at the earliest meetings of this team, are not on it.
The contract binding this team together is one of love. Yes, we just had a formal signing of a contract, but that piece of paper is not the thing that will keep you together. Only your love for each other will keep this team contract in place.
There will be things that try to break this contract, from arguments about money, arguments over the hours that each of you work, to arguments over the amount of beer and shots that either of you may drink.
Do not ever let these small things come between the love that you have for each other. At the time, an argument may seem like the end, I assure you that your love for each other can be stronger than any outside influence.
Every team has an opponent. So who or what is the enemy of this team? Honestly, your opponent is the world. The world will do everything it can to tear your team apart. You will be tempted by the world. You will be tempted to fight over those things I mentioned before. You will be tempted to fight over things we don't even know exist today. When you have these fights and arguments, remind yourself that you are a team. Everything you do is for the team. Do not let the world win.
I've heard a friend say before, "I can never win, when I argue with my wife". And that's true. You should never try to win an argument with your love. You two are not adversaries in marriage. You ARE the team. Always try to see the point behind the other's argument. Defend your ideas, do not attack the other person. Soon, (if you aren't already there) you two will know more about each other than anyone else in the world knows about the other person. You will know what things hurt them the most. When you have an argument, and you think you are losing; it's better to lose the argument, than to unleash the thing that you know will hurt the most; just to "win". In marriage, you can never WIN against your spouse. You will only win WITH your spouse.
Never forget the way you feel today. Always remember how beautiful Rebecca looks in her dress. Always remember how awesome FU looks in his kilt. Always remember why you chose each other. These are the things that will get you through tough times. Tough times don't last, strong teams do.
There's already another person who needs this team to be together. In the future, there will probably be (at least) another who needs this team to be together. The team of Matthew and Rebecca, or Fubecca as I call it, needs to be the strongest team around. If the team of just you two is strong, it will support the other family teams that you make.
I wish nothing more for you, than to be the best team out there.

(also, there was a slight change while spoken, as it was changed to "we will soon have a formal signing")

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