How to become President of the United States (a guide)

How to become president of the United States (a guide)

 

There are two phases to becoming president, step 1, you must win your primary. How do you do that? In order to win your primary, you have to be the "cleanest" person in your party. Why the "cleanest"? It's because everyone you are going up against is pretty much the exact same as you. You all (mostly) share the same ideals, values, and norms. Any person who is an outlier in the primary will be quickly discarded, even if they have good ideas (see Ron Paul). You must be the person with the least amount of skeletons in your closet. If the stuff is already known about you, you will be fine (see Newt Gingrich). You can not be the target of any new allegations (see Herman Cain). Any new allegations must be either discarded as irrelevant, or as youthful indiscretions (even in your 40's, see George W. Bush).

If a new allegation comes up, or you have something in your past that no one knows about, you need to get that out in the open right away. You should already have everything that you've ever done out in the public record, when someone finds out that you did something "bad" before, and you try to hide it; you are screwed.

Since you are pretty much exactly like the others that you are running with, there are several things that will help you win your parties nomination.

Be tall. People expect tall people to be leaders, even if they aren't. If you aren't 6 foot tall, you are probably screwed. When standing on the stage with your opponent, you will look less impressive, if the person towers over you and looks down upon you.

Have a position that is just a little different than the others. Don't be radically different, just a bit different. This is why Ron Paul can't win the election. He may be in second or third in the polls, but the fans of the others aren't going to back him if their candidate quits the race. He is stuck with the number of people who want him to win. The only way he can win, is if some new scandal finds the others that are running.

Look presidential. Even though Barack Obama is black, television shows and movies with black presidents have already softened people to think that maybe a black president is ok. Obama kind of looks like the black presidents in movies, that's why he's presidential looking. You can't look unfit or unhealthy for the times. Taft could never be elected today. Back in the early 1900's a fat person wouldn't have the stigma that a fat person has now. (Taft was the last truly hefty president). Everyone now, is relatively long and lean.

If you are just running to enhance your book sales, then it doesn't really matter what you look like, or how tall you are, or what your positions are, or what you plans are (no matter how dumb or smart they are); you will lose the election.

Have a book published. Your job as congressman, or as a spokesman, or as whatever else it is that is your normal salary, isn't enough. You need to get royalty checks. Everyone who supports you must purchase this book. They may not make a donation to your PAC, but they can give the money directly to you, in the form of your book.

Have a family. Actually, have a daughter or two. Bush 1 was the last president with sons. If you have sons, they must be politically active and be of the same party. If you have daughters, you must say that "your family is off limits" even though you are using them as props to get you elected.

Remember, you are a rock star. You may think you are an everyman who just somehow fell into all this stuff, but you spent your whole life manipulating people into getting your way. You aren't some schlub off the street who wants to shake the hand of someone, you are the guy who's germs are going to be on someone for a month because after they shook your hand, they didn't wash it. Accept your rockstardom. It you will need it.

So, to sum up: you must be just like everyone else in your party; you must not have anything hidden in your past (since you have a book, you need to put a chapter of everything bad that you've ever done, that way no one can surprise you with it, and the fact that you've admitted a "mistake" will earn you forgiveness… even if you killed someone); have a couple of daughters (2 seems to be the perfect number); have a book (or 2); be tall; be somewhat fit.

So, now that you've won your party's nomination, how do you guarantee that you are the person elected president.

Let's look at the past winners and who they were up against.

2008 Obama, McCain

2004 Bush, Kerry

2000 Bush, Gore

1996 Clinton, Dole

1992 Clinton, Bush 1

1988 Bush1, Dukakis

1984 Reagan, Mondale

1980 Reagan, Carter

1976 Carter, Ford

1972 Nixon, McGovern

Winners on the left, losers on the right… what do all the winners have?

They are more charismatic than the people they beat. Clinton was definitely more charismatic than Bush, but Bush was more than Dukakis.

During the early 2000's George W Bush wasn't unbeatable, the democrats were just really stupid. Half the country hated Bush, and all the democrats could put up were guys who had less personality than a wet towel.

Based on the charisma factor, the two people you wouldn't want to run against are Reagan and Obama (Clinton is a close third).

The actual election has little to do with politics, and so much to do with who's the person who can captivate the crowd.

Winning is all about charisma (and no skeletons). Gary Hart wouldn't have beaten Reagan in 1984 (lost to Mondale in the primary), but he would have beaten Dukakis if it wasn't for his affair. Had he beaten Dukakis, he would have beaten Bush based on the charisma factor.

The vice presidential choice makes little difference in the ability to win. You cannot select someone who is more charismatic than you to be your VP though. It won't help. Sarah Palin may be polarizing, she has enough charisma to win the general election, but wouldn't make it through the primary. Dukakis selection of Lloyd Bentsen didn't provide enough boost to overcome his looking like a midget when he was in the tank.

Jack Kemp may have been the best non-winning vp candidate, but he had more charisma than Dole. Kemp vs Clinton in 96 with Gore and Dole as the vp's would have been a tighter race. (Clinton would still have won).

So, to sum up: after you have won your primary, you need to have the stage presence to beat the other person. You may be good in one year, but you might not be the next time (see Bush). For this reason, there isn't a republican who can beat Obama this year. The only candidate who could have, would have been Herman Cain, but his affairs cost him that chance.

Endorsements don't matter, newspapers don't matter, all that matters is that you can carry yourself better than the other guy.

 

Standing Up

 

I'm going to try something.

I'm going to see the effects of standing. I'm not going to change pretty much anything else that I do. I'm not going to eat less, I'm not going to drink less, I'm not going to exercise more. I'm just going to stand up more.

I'm going to do this for 30 days (ish) just to see what happens.

I'm under the impression that I sit and relax too much. I think we all probably do.

Looking at my current routine, about the only time where I'm on my feet for a long period of time is when I'm bartending (Saturday at Radio Maria from 3 until 2; and Sunday from 3 until 9, come see me). The rest of the week, I'm pretty much seated.

I wake up from sleep (laying down), get dressed, get in the car (seated), go to work from 8-5 (about 95% seated), drive home, then watch tv (seated). The evenings are a bit different, Monday at 10 is beer class; Tuesday is off;  Wednesday is some work at Radio, then drinking; Thursday is off; Friday is happy hour, but I'm not going to change any of my routine. The only thing I'm going to do is stand more.

So, when it's not needed for me to sit at my desk and do something (bent over doesn't seem like a good way to spend the day) I'm going to be standing.

I'm not sure what I weigh now, but I know that my belt fluctuates between the second and third notch. So, about the only proof we'll have for results is where I fasten my belt, and how my clothes look on me (although I will probably go to the scale and see what I weigh with my clothes on).

So, let's see what happens. Can standing up really make a difference. If it makes a difference in me, will it make a difference in you?

Here we go.

 

The End of the World

Then End of the World

I assume Harold Camping is quite pissed right now. It’s deservedly so. He thought the world was going to end today. He thought the rapture was going to be back in May. We are all still here. So, today/tomorrow, he’s going to have to come up with an excuse as to why the world is not destroyed. (I’ve got several theories, including that it’s all bullshit, but I’ll leave that out)

So, why is the world here? I think the best story for comparison is that of Jonah. You probably know the Jonah and the Whale story, but do you know the back story. Do you know how it applies to Harold Camping and the End of the World?

Jonah was told by God to go to Nineveh, to tell them that God was going to destroy them.

Jonah 1:2 Arise, go to Nineveh, that great city, and cry against it; for their wickedness is come up before me.

But Jonah didn’t want to go to Nineveh, so he took a ship to Tarshish. This angered God, so he sent a storm at the boat. The mariners were angry with Jonah because it was his god that caused the storm, so they threw him overboard. Jonah was then eaten by a fish. After three days, the fish puked Jonah up on the land.

God told Jonah to go to Nineveh again, and tell the people they were going to be destroyed. So this time, Jonah went.

Jonah 3:4 And Jonah began to enter into the city a day's journey, and he cried, and said, Yet forty days, and Nineveh shall be overthrown.

5 So the people of Nineveh believed God, and proclaimed a fast, and put on sackcloth, from the greatest of them even to the least of them.

So the people actually repented.

10 And God saw their works, that they turned from their evil way; and God repented of the evil, that he had said that he would do unto them; and he did it not.

God didn’t destroy Nineveh that day. So everyone rejoiced, including Jonah…

It goes Jonah 3:10 to Jonah 4:1. Here is Jonah 4:1

Jonah 4:1 But it displeased Jonah exceedingly, and he was very angry.

Jonah was pissed that the place wasn’t destroyed. God then gives Jonah a show, with a worm and a gourd, and tells him some advice.

And should not I spare Nineveh, that great city, wherein are more than sixscore thousand persons that cannot discern between their right hand and their left hand; and also much cattle?

God says, Hey, there was a lot of people in there to be saved. Don’t be mad that I spared them… today.

Harold Camping believes the world is going to end today. He has made lots of people believe the world is going to end today. He will come up with an excuse for why the world didn’t end today. He’ll claim his calculations are off. He’ll claim that he missed a piece. He’ll claim that the math was wrong… (He won’t claim the 930 years of Adam’s life, AS thing as I’ve mentioned in other places, but that’s a different story). The thing he won’t mention is that maybe, God didn’t destroy the world, because it repented.

Are we living in the modern version of Nineveh? Did we repent? Did you repent?

Is Camping going to act like Jonah in 4:1 and be pissed that the earth wasn’t destroyed, like he was told/figured/calculated it to be? Probably. The best thing that Camping can do is to say that the earth repented, and God spared us, just like he did Nineveh. Then never make a stupid prediction again.

Christians seem to really look forward to the end of the world. It’s rather discomforting.

 

 

 

Getting Personal

Name, age, town of residence

Virgil, 40, Urbana

 

Profession: Explain in one sentence what it is you do.

I make printing work, along with server administration; and I buy beer, bartend, and drink beer.

 

What time do you typically get up? What do you do the first hour of the morning?

My alarm is set for 7:02, I love multiples of 9. I drink a Diet Mountain Dew, smoke a cigarette and get ready for work.

What did you have for lunch today? Where? With whom?

I skipped lunch (so far) today, yesterday I had bbq chicken quarter (white meat), with mashed potatoes (no gravy), and southwest corn, in the Carle cafeteria, by myself.

Best high school memory.

Getting arrested for illegal consumption of alcohol by a minor. It created the best story to tell, and (to me) bad decisions make the best stories.

Tell me about your favorite pair of shoes.

I have a red suede pair of casket creepers. They have 1 inch soles, and in the middle of the sole, there’s a casket that covers a compartment, where you could put… um… things… mine has a dollar bill in it.

What does a perfect Sunday afternoon include?

I bartend on Sunday afternoon, so, it wouldn’t be too busy, several of my friends, people drinking beer, and me having time to talk to them about beer. Also, the Packers would win a game, and my fantasy football team would score lots of points.

Was there one book you read as a child that you still cherish? Own? Read?

I don’t remember reading much as a child. As a teen, I read a lot of Clive Barker, I still own all those books. More recently I’ve read the Lucifer Principle by Howard Bloom, and Global Brain (also by Bloom), those are good non-fiction works. I also read the Bible, but don’t believe it. Good Omens by Neil Gaiman, and Terry Pratchett is one of my favorite fiction works.

Where on earth are you dying to go? Why?

If I could go anywhere, right now… it’d be Three Floyds Brewery on November 12, for their 15^th anniversary party. There will be some great beers and brewers there.

Tell me about your favorite pet.

Peggy, my mutt dog. The ex-wife picked her up at a shelter. She always ran way, but we always got her back. She seemed to genuinely love me, and I loved her back.

Have you discovered as you matured that you are becoming like one of your parents? Which one and how?

I notice that I’m developing traits of my father. I tend to compartmentalize, and can get angry/frustrated when things don’t go exactly the way I think they should go.

What would you order for your last meal?

A pound of beef tenderloin (rare), risotto with wild mushrooms, asparagus, a balsamic reduction on the beef, a cheese sauce on the asparagus, for desert, crème brulee. To drink, Westvletereen 12 with the asparagus, St. Bernardus dubbel with the meat, Two Brothers Domaine du Page with the rice, and Three Floyds Dark Lord with the desert.

What can you NOT live without?

Music, beer, diet mountain dew.

Who do you have on your iPod?

All the music I own, mostly industrial (Ministry, KMFDM, NIN, PIG), however there’s some other stuff (Cure, Depeche Mode, Chemlab).

What’s the happiest memory of your life?

Probably the first time I saw Ministry. I went down to Louisville, and picked up my brother, and we went to Jillians (they had one there too) and I saw them for the first time. It had been something I wanted to do for many years (dozen? Twenty?) and finally got to do it. I made a gesture to my brother symbolizing “I can die happy now” then the show ended. We drove back to his place, listening to the radio at what we thought was a normal volume, later fell asleep with ears ringing.  When we got into the truck the next morning, the radio was at its highest volume and it scared us, it was so loud when it came on.

Otherwise, I don’t have any kids, and I’m not planning on getting remarried. I have a bottle of beer (yes, Three Floyds) that we picked up at this past years Dark Lord Day. The purchase price was $50. Later that day, other bottles of it were on Ebay for $500 (it is very limited, only done once, in numbered bottles), and me and the girlfriend were wondering when we could drink a $500 (value) bottle of beer? We aren’t going to have kids, and we aren’t going to get married, so when is the appropriate time to drink that… we still haven’t figured it out.

If you could host a dinner party with any three living people in the world, whom would you invite?

If I’m hosting a dinner party, then all my friends are invited; the other 3 people in the world who I would invite would be: Mikkel (a Danish brewer), Al Jourgenson (the man behind Ministry), and Niel Degrasse Tyson (from NOVA, he’s soooo cool and smart).

What’s the best advice you’ve ever been given?

On Duckman (an old cartoon) Duckman once told the kids,  “Remember kids, when you get to prison attach yourself to the biggest, toughest, meanest looking goon you can find. You don't wanna wind up as just anyone's bitch.“

More seriously…

Not sure if it was advice, but the instructor at airborne school once told me to “go! Go! Go!” and so I jumped out of a plane. Go, you might as well do something. When told to jump, don’t waste time asking how high, just do what you are told.

What’s your best piece of advice?

Accept happiness.

What was your first job, and how much did you make an hour?

Newspaper delivery, I think I operated at a loss. Otherwise, lifeguard, minimum wage, whatever that was in ’88.

What was a pivotal decision in your career, and how did you arrive at that decision?

In ’99 I was in the Army, and the army decided to send me to Korea for a year. I was in this rare window, that I would have to re-enlist in order to go, or I could get out of the army. It would have been a year separation from my wife (at the time) and I knew that a year separation, had hurt stronger marriages than I had; so I chose to get out (later the wife was sent to Iraq for a year, and that pretty much ended that marriage, so I was right). I then got a job doing server administration, and the rest is history.

Do you have a bad habit? What is it?

Some would consider smoking to be a bad habit. Some would consider drinking to be a bad habit. Some would consider that I’m an atheist to be a bad habit. Some would consider that I don’t look like I conform (Mohawk, facial hair, tattoos) to be a bad habit. I don’t think I have a bad habit, I just do things that others don’t like.

How do you handle a stressful situation?

I fix the problem. Then it isn’t a problem anymore.

 

don't be bullied

So, yesterday I had to attend Horizontal Violence (incivility) training, it’s mandatory for the place I work. Basically, there’s about a 10% turnover in new staff each year, and one of the main reasons was something like a hostile work environment. The people either didn’t fit in, or felt they were bullied.

Bullying is the new big thing (Just did a google news search and there are 8,840 stories in the past hour). It’s now why kids kill themselves. It’s why people quit jobs. It’s why people go home unhappy. It’s why they then take their work life out on their families.

Is it because people are too sensitive? In the corporate world, we aren’t talking about physical violence, that will get you fired, we are talking about (basically) hurting someone’s feelings. I don’t like the way you rolled your eyes at me. I don’t like you talking behind my back. I don’t like you giving me the silent treatment. I don’t like you blaming me. I don’t like you backstabbing me. I don’t like… Jeebus. Grow a spine.

In modern society, it seems the goal is to do one thing, fit in. Look around next time you go out, how many people drive the same car, wear the same jacket, have the same haircut, wear the same perfume. People do almost everything they can to be the most … um… GENERIC. It’s not cheap to be generic, some of the things they have are really expensive, but EVERYONE has it. (North Face Jackets for example) People fight as hard as they can to NOT be unique. They think they are “different” and “special”, but deep down, they just want to blend in.

When I went to basic training, I received some of the worst advice ever from my cousin; he said something like “don’t let the drill sergeants know who you are”. I think when he graduated from Basic Training, the drills were like, wait, who are you? This is most people. Their goal is not to be noticed. They want to be wall flowers. You’d think that’d be easy to do in camouflage. But, it’s the people that try to blend in and not be noticed who are the ones who are yelled at, dropped for pushups, and singled out. Why? Because, the army needs people who can be yelled at, and can do their job; and not start crying and worry about their feelings and not accomplish their mission. If you can do your job correctly under pressure, then you can do it. There is pressure in war.

So why is bullying a problem for people who want to blend in? It means that someone has determined that you are special. You have gotten me to choose you (out of EVERYONE else) to pick on. You are no longer a faceless drone, you are now… UNIQUE! It’s the last thing you want. You just want to go about your day, do your job, maybe have someone say “good job” or “thank you” but most likely you would prefer no recognition at all. If someone is yelling at you, talking about you, rolling their eyes at you, well… you have become special. You are no longer faceless person #2, you are SOMEONE. You are suddenly unique. You don’t know what to do with yourself.

Modern society almost demands that you be a drone. Children’s games are outlawed because someone might get hurt. Score isn’t kept at kids sporting events because “everyone is a winner”; well everyone is also a loser. Everyone is the same, and that’s the way society wants it. Getting hurt is an easy way to learn. Losing, and not liking losing, is a reason to get better. Why get better if it doesn’t matter what you do, since there is no score? Kids are all treated the same. Which is bullshit. Everyone needs to be treated differently. I am different than you, you are different than her, she is different than him. If they are all treated the same, how will we know who does what good?

That’s the first factor about bullying (probably the most overlooked one) that people don’t want to stand out in a crowd. People look at the different people … differently. They actually notice them. I was the guy with the Mohawk in the class… I was the one with a different opinion. Why? I don’t mind being noticed.

The other factor in modern bullying goes to people’s inability to accept happiness. Happiness is all around, you just have to accept it. Trust me, there are great things out there. If you look for something, you will find it. If you are unhappy, look for a reason to be happy. I’m not saying ignore your problems and they will go away, I’m saying, there’s no reason to be permanently unhappy. If you have massive problems with money or a job, or … whatever, that’s different. If you are on the internet reading this, you have a computer (or access to one) or a smart phone… how many people in the world don’t have those things.

Heck, if you are here, you probably like beer. Hurray beer! Don’t drink to drown your problems, drink because beer is great! How can you be unhappy if there’s a beer in front of you? Why would you be unhappy if there’s a beer? Find a thing you like, and be happy about that.

Don’t hate Monday. Love your weekend. It’s only 5 days till the next one. I see some people ruining their weekend because they hate Monday. Screw that, I’m going to enjoy the time I have when I have it, instead of waiting for something bad.

If little things piss you off, you need to relax and not worry about it. If your day is ruined because someone cut you off in traffic, then you really need to learn to enjoy what you have. If you are cut off in traffic, you are going somewhere (hurray, you have a place to go), you have a vehicle (hurray, you have a car), you have money to put gas in the car (hurray, you have some gas), you have many many things. Why would you let something like… someone not using a turn signal… even put you in a bad mood for a split second?

Anyone who makes you lose your cool, isn’t worth losing your cool over. If you think someone is worth losing your cool over, they shouldn’t make you lose your cool. Don’t let someone else affect your mood. A person who cuts you off on the road, isn’t worth your time to flip them off. You won’t feel better about doing it. They won’t care, even if it does. Just be happy.

If you dwell on the things that make you unhappy, you won’t be able to experience all the joy that comes from the things that can make you happy.

If you dread mowing the lawn, be thankful you have a yard. If you have to paint the house, congrats, you have a house. If your kid is crying, then someone has found you to be an acceptable mate and has procreated with you, that’s probably something to write about.

So, in order to not be bullied, you have to accept happiness, and not care that you are no longer a faceless drone.

Good luck

 

 

 

CU Beer Weekend, Aug 26

Seven Saints

 

Brewsday Tuesday: Cellar Sale, All Brewsday beers $2 (Left Hand Stranger, Smuttynose Pale, Abita Jockamo, Left Hand Sawtooth)

Whiskey Wednesday: Scotch

 

Radio Maria

 

Clown Shoes Eagle Claw Fist

Founders Cerise

Founders Red's Rye

Capital Fest Beer

Left Hand Fade to Black Vol. 2

Founders Dirty Bastard

Bell's Hopslam

Left Hand Week Sauce

Southern Tier Creme Brulee

Southern Tier Cuvee 3

Dark Horse Plead the 5th

Smuttynose Gravitation Quad

Moylan's Hopsickle Imperial IPA

Samichlaus

Crown Valley Worktruck Wheat

Wexford Irish Cream Ale (nitro)

North Coast Old Rasputin (nitro)

Monk's Cafe Flemish Sour Red Ale

Dark Horse Boffo Brown

North Coast Scrimshaw Pilsner

Stone Levitation

Goose Island Matilda

Hofbrau maibock

Smuttynose Barleywine

De Proef K-O

Blanche de Bruxelles

PBR

 

Friday: Happy Hour with free appetizers 4:30 - 5:30,

Saturday: Salsa, 10 pm, no cover before 11

Sunday: $2 wells, $1.25 PBR; Bloody Mary Bar

Monday: Beer Class, $10, 10pm; 6% or less ABV beer

Tuesday: 1/2 price wine by the glass

Wednesday: $1 off all beers on draft; Open Decks

Thursday: Chillax

 

Crane Alley

 

Victory Donnybrook Stout 3.7%

Moylan's Orange & Black Congrats Ale 6.0%

Lagunitas IPA 6.2%

Monk's Cafe Flemish Sour Ale 5.5%

Krusovice Czech Pils 5.0%

Lost Abbey Serpent's Stout 10.5%

Founders Blushing Monk 9.2%

Left Hand Sawtooth Ale 5.3%

Bier du Boucanier 7.0%

O'Fallon Wheach 5.1%

Stone Levitation Ale 4.4%

Ommegang Witte 5.1%

Erdinger Hefe Weizen 5.4%

Avery 18th Anniversary Dry-Hopped Saison 8.1%

Scotch de Silly 8.0%

Original Sin Hard Cider 6.0%

Avery Samael's 14.5%

Two Brothers Hop Juice 9.9%

PBR 4.2%

 

 

Blind Pig Brewery

 

Blind Pig Hard Cider

Blind Pig English Summer Ale

Blind Pig Replicale 2011-BPA

Two Brothers’ Dog Days  Lager; Warrenville, IL, Helles, 4.9% abv

Schlafly Pilsner; Maplewood, Missouri, Pilsener, 4.9% abv

Southern Tier Crème Brulee;  Lakewood, New York, Imperial Stout, 9.2% abv

O’Fallon Peach Wheach; O’Fallon, Missouri, Fruit Beer, 4.75% abv

Ommegang Aphrodite; Cooperstown, New York, Fruit Beer, 8.9% abv

Dieu du Ciel Rosee dHibiscus;  Canada, Spice Ale, 5.9% abv

Stone Levitation;  Escondido, California, Amber Ale, 4.4% abv

Franziskaner Hefe-Weissbier; Germany, German Hefeweizen, 5%abv

Founder’s Centennial IPA; Grand Rapids, Michigan, India Pale Ale, 7.2% abv

Guinness; Ireland, Dry Stout, 4.1% abv

 

Destihl

 

Saison de Ruisseau

Belgian Pale Ale

Raspberry Wheat

Triton Barleywine

Black Angel Stout

Frankengluten Belgian Sorghum Ale

Hoperation Overload Double IPA

Hawaii Five Ale

Altercation

Baldock IPA

Champaign Blonde Ale

Biere Brune

Weisenheimer Hefeweizen

Roadblock British Red Ale

Jacob's Ladder

Tripel

 

Blind Pig

 

Rogue American Amber; Newport, Oregon, Amber Ale, 5.1%

Breckenridge Amber; Denver, Colorado, Amber, 5.4%

Victory Hop Wallop; Downington, Pennsylvania, Imperial IPA, 8.5% abv

Lagunitas IPA; Petaluma, California, India Pale Ale, 6.2% abv

O’Fallon Peach Wheach; O’Fallon, Missouri, Fruit Beer, 4.75% abv

Two Brothers’ Dog Days Lager; Warrenville, Illinois, Dortmunder, 4.9% abv

Founder’s Porter; Grand Rapids, Michigan, Porter, 6.5% abv

Avery Ellie’s Brown; Boulder, Colorado, Brown Ale, 5.5% abv

Fuller’s London Pride; England, Premium Bitter, 4.7% abv  

Delirium Tremens; Belgium, Belgian Strong Ale, 8.5% abv

Blue Moon; Golden, Colorado, Belgian White, 5.4% abv

Unibrou Trois Pistoles; Canada, Belgian Strong Ale, 9% abv

Stella Artois; Belgium, Pale Lager, 5.2% abv

Pabst Blue Ribbon; Milwaukee, Wisconsin, Pale Lager, 5% abv

Rogue Morimoto Soba Ale; Newport, Oregon, Specialty Grain, 4.8%

Moylan’s Hefe Weiss; Novato, California, Wiezen, 7% abv 

Tucher Helles Hefe Weizen; Germany, German Hefeweizen, 5.3%

Lost Coast Tangerine Wheat; Eureka, California, Fruit Beer, 5%

Krusovice Imperial 12; Czech Republic, Bohemian Pilsener, 5%

Ommegang Cup O Kyndness; Cooperstown, New York, Scotch Ale, 6.6% abv

Southern Tier Porter; Lakewood, New York, Porter, 5.6% abv

Lindeman’s Framboise; Belgium, Lambic, 2.5% abv

Moylan’s Nitro Special Bitte;r Novato, California, English Pale Ale, 5.2%

Guinness; Ireland, Dry Stout, 4.2%

 

Black Dog Smoke and Ale House

 

Two Brothers Resistance IPA

Dark Horse Crooked Tree

Smuttynose Shoals Pale Ale

Port Brewing Anniversary Ale

 

Quality Beer

 

Green Flash Imperial IPA

Goose Island Sofie

Lagunitas A Little Sumpin Wild

Sand Creek Hard Lemonade

Scrimshaw Pilsner

 

CU4beer: Destihl, the new brewery in town

CU4beer: Destihl, the new brewery in town: "Kridz, Matt, and I went to Destihl in Champaign last night. First, lets clear up some rumors. I've heard several people claim they don't wa..."

Champaign Urbana softball 2011

It's softball season, or soon will be.

Both Po' Boys and Champaign Parks have their info out.

Po' Boys

League entry deadline is April 13. Leagues may fill before the deadline.

Men's Rec SH - 1 ump/ 3HR, Sunday, 5/1 -8/7, 13 games $585
Men's Rec DH - 1 ump/ 3HR, Monday, 4/25 -8/8, 14 games $770
Men's Rec DH - 1 ump/ 3HR, Tuesday, 4/26 -7/26, 14 games $770
Men's Rec DH - 1 ump/ 3HR, Wednesday, 4/27 -7/27, 14 games $770
Men's Rec DH - 1 ump/ 3HR, Friday, 4/29 -8/12, 14 games $800

Women's Rec SH - 1 ump, Monday, 4/25 -8/8, 14 games $425

Co-Rec SH - 1 ump/ 3HR, Sunday, 5/1 -8/7, 13 games $585
Co-Rec SH - 1 ump/ 3HR, Wednesday, 4/27 -8/10, 14 games $560

For more info, email Rich Kelly at poboyssoftball@hotmail.com

Champaign Park District

League entry deadline is March 11.

Women's Recreational, Thursday, 4/14 -8/25, $555
Women's Semi-competitive, Thursday, 4/14-8/25 $555

Co-Rec Recreational (blue), Sunday, 4/17-8/28, $555
Co-Rec Semi-Competitive (orange), Sunday, 4/17-8/28, $555
Co-Rec Recreational, Thursday, 4/14-8/25, $555

Men's Single Heder, Monday, 4/11-8/22, $555
Men's Rec DH (Orange, more competitive) Wednesday, 4/13-8/24, $830
Men's Rec DH (Blue, less competetive), Wednesday, 4/13-8/24, $830
Men's Semi-Competitive (the big boys), Tuesday, 4/12-8/23, $830

For questions call Joe, at 398-2571 or email joe.kearfott@cparkdistrict.com

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My cousin is getting scammed

I almost got scammed.

I received an email today from my cousin, it said this.

I'm writing this with tears in My eyes My Family and I came down here to ( London,England ) for a short vacation,unfortunately we were mugged at the park of the hotel where we stayed all cash,credit card and cell were stolen off us but luckily for us we still have our passports with us.

We've been to the embassy and the Police here but they're not helping issues at all and our flight leaves in less than 3hrs from now but we're having problems settling the hotel bills and the hotel manager won't let us leave until we settle the bills.

Am freaked out at the moment.

Thanks
Mitzi

I ignored the email. But the hackers are getting smarter, they have now begun to use Facebook.

So, they logged into her facebook account and looked for whoever in her friends list was online. I was... then this happened.

[them] hello
[me] hey
[them] do you got my email?
[me] i think so, what's going on, how can i help
[them] thanks for willing to help
all we need is 2,000usd
[me] i don't have that much.
[them] how much can you spare now
[me] i've got about $500 available.
[them] ok
we promise to refund it as soon as we are back home
can i give you the info
[me] yeah, and i'll see what i can do.
[them] ok
can i email you the info
[You] yes
[them] ok
are you there?
[me] yes
[them] you can check your yahoo mail box now
[me] checking
[them] ok
you can weird to my name via western union outlet around you.
are you there?
are you there?
[me] checking on western union
[them] ok
how long will it take you to have it done?
are you there?
[me] dunno, fillign out the western union stuff now.
[them] ok
how long will it take you to have it done?
are you there?

This is where I talked to my sister...


[me] so, mitzi, how do we know each other?
[them] OMG, Are you doubting me or what ??
[me] sort of, since my sister said she's talking to you at work right now.
[them] nop the muggers has went away with our phone
[me] ok, when did you get an international plan?
[them] i and david left state last night
david is in hospital right now
Mitzi is offline.12:41pm
[them] he was hurt with is is head
[me] ok, when did we last see each other?
[them] What a million of question Virgil
[me] and why are you calling me virgil?
[them] O mg let me know if you are helping us out
cos our return flight leaves few hours from now
[me] is he going to be out of the hospital by then?
[them] are you helping us out?
[You] only if you tell me where we last saw each other.
That's the entire conversation.
(It's my cousin Mitzi)

They wanted the money wired to :

Address: 4 Richmond Mews, London W1D 3DH, England
Country: London, United Kingdom

That was in the second email they sent, after I offered to help.

I still have my passport so I can use it as identification, e-mail me the transfer details and the confirmation number include the amount sent..


Let me know as soon as you are heading out to the Western union

I asked my sister if she got the email from Mitzi, and she said she was talking to her on the phone. That Mitzi was at work in California. Apparently lots of people in the family called her.

Just got a text from Mitzi, wondering if the hacker was friendly.

The hacker as Mitzi has unfriended me on facebook :(

After hearing from my sister, I did a google search for the words in the email, and it's a rather popular scam.

The Google search.

Here's more on it.

Travel Scam Alert- Your friend was not mugged

With the advent of facebook, these scams can be much harder to discern. They got me. I even had created a western union account to send them money.

With Facebook, they can go back and see how you are related, who you have in common, and even know all kinds of other neat information, like the spouses and children's names.

So there you go, if you get an email asking for money, check the internet to see if it's been done before.

V

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